She's a Rainbow

Have you seen her all in gold
Like a queen in days of old
She shoots colors all around
Like a sunset going down
Have you seen the lady fairer
She comes in colors everywhere;
She combs her hair
She's like a rainbow

(Rolling Stones - 1967)

It's not a perfect world!

I learned this Sunday from two sources - a 7 year old Mite-C player at about 6:15am (see - already not a perfect world especially after only 3-1/2hrs sleep) and a girls team coach at around noon.
The title for this post is a direct quote from the coach who tried to explain why I shouldn't have called a penalty on his team for illegally substituting for a player coming off of a penalty. His excuse was based on the odd way the penalty bench is set up in this particular rink (his home rink where his team plays half it games) is not clearly separated from their players bench and therefore is "not a perfect world" (he did not dispute the rule, or dispute the fact that they broke it). It did make me wish I had realized this eternal truth earlier so that I might have used it as words of comfort to the earlier distraught 7 year old. He had been involved in one of those Mite-C collisions (one can't turn, one can't stop = CRASH!). As I knelt next to the crying child, his coach came to help him up and asked the boy "what happened". The from-the-mouths-of babes reply was "that big kid checked me into the God Damned boards!"

To sum it all up....

St. Lucia & Sandals Resorts are great - I recommend them to anyone. But as wonderful a location it was, the best part was remembering how much fun it is to adventure and explore with Sue and how easy it was to be in love with her. Certainly the kids and our daily life in general are adventures of their own sort, and we still love each other - but to be so far away just the two of us removed the mountains of obstacles and have-to's that typically make it hard to see our wonderful forest for all of our mundane trees. Once upon a time, we were able to go hiking, or to the beach, or simply out to eat without fretting about who was babysitting or who had to be picked up when, or if we had it in our budget. So for a whole week it was magically like old times. Although I wasn't perfect way back then, and certainly I have not fixed any flaws since then (the word regress might fit here), it was so easy to be at my best on our vacation. Now the challenge is to retain the feelings of renewal as we navigate the same-old same-old routines. I'll keep trying to live up to the challenge because I know how worth it she is. The proof is still fresh in my mind.

Pirate Night at St Lucia Sandals

Fire breathing men, fire eating women, limbo dancers all followed the St Lucian drum semi-circle. Watch and be amazed!

http://picasaweb.google.com/don.sueblauss/StLucia2008Video#5269611981642218306

OK - I know that THIS is what you really want to hear

by now you are already sick of hearing about how wonderful and perfect our trip was. You realize it couldn't possibly be ALL great. So this should make you feel better.



day 1 - we had to get out of bed at 2:00am and drive to Logan Airport

day 1 - we weren't on the pick up list at the St Lucia airport

day 1 - Sue didn't get her cold towel when we arrived at the resort

day 2 - there was another guitar player at the "Staff/ Guest" talent show

day 2 - they didn't declare a talent show "winner" (and I totally would have won it)

day 3 - the hungover "other" guitar player and his grumpy buddy's joined us on the horseback ride

day 3 - I caught a cold/sore throat

day 4 - I got an earful/mouthfull/nosefull/swimsuitfull of sand&surf while body surfing

day 4 - I lost my "Rock & Roll Hall Of Fame" bandanna in the surf (and it was doing such a fine job of preventing the top of my head from getting sunburned up to then)

day 4 - I got kicked out of the ocean by the lifeguards because the waves were too rough (not for me, but the other body surfers must have looked like they were out of their league)

day 5 - an hour & 15 minutes and Mass was not yet finished

day 5 - I got kicked out of the small pool (who knew they treated it at 9:00pm?)

day 5 - a random cloud on the horizon interfered with an otherwise perfect sunset

day 6 - Englishmen in their 60's keep informing us of everything they are certain we don't know

day 6 - another random cloud on the horizon interfered with another otherwise perfect sunset

day 6 - the "Pirate" ship sailing across the sunset didn't actually attack the yacht

day 7 - the 4 mile drive to the snorkling boat took a half hour

day 7 - I wasn't allowed to pretend to be a shark while snorkling

day 8 - we had to leave

day 8 - climbing to 38000ft and decending again is very painful when you have water in your ears (each time)

day 8 - Miami Airport Customs

day 8 - Boston weather 45 degrees & rainy

WOW! Suddenly I realize what a horrible time I must have had (thank goodnes I didn't realize it at the time!)

There now - don't you feel better - knowing the true suffering we had to endure? - after we tried so hard to make you all jealous? - aren't you glad it was us and not you?

All that being said, knowing what I know now..... lets go back tomorrow!!!!!

it was strange to spend a week:

(except for a few rare occasions - which simply served to impress the point)
not really needing a watch
not really needing a wallet
eating whatever you wanted
eating more than you ever wanted
drinking whatever / whenever / wherever you wanted
wondering if I'd get determined enough to get my moneys worth and really drunk (sorry to disappoint you all, but I did whip Sue a pingpong while I have a mild buzz)
being served by genuinely happy friendly wait staff EVERYWHERE, ALL THE TIME
being greeted by genuinely happy friendly people everywhere we went - both on and off the resort
looking at flowers growing (outdoors) in November
looking at bikini's EVERYWHERE in November (heck, at anytime of year)
realizing that it was impossible to NOT look at bikini's - they were truly unescapable
realizing that the women were not bashful/concerned/offended
and that the men were not learing/creepy/offensive
where each days top priority for many people was to claim the select lounge chairs early enough
choosing to do things on a whim, or nothing at all - and it was all acceptable.
wondering how such a small, poor country produced so many top-rate cover bands
wondering when I became so bad at pool (I used to be ok)
not really worrying about the kids back home
wondering why we didn't do this sooner
realizing that if we did this years ago, we would have had many years of disappointing vacations!
trying to figure out how/how soon we can get back again

a view with a room

Sue wanted a balconey with an ocean view. This was the view.

Thankfully there was a room attached to it! The room was very basic, but with the balcony, view, and entire resort just steps away - who needed more? It had a private outside entrance (where occasionally there was a tiny tree frog sitting on the railing, waiting for us) so it did not feel like a typical plain hotel room.

The sound of the ocean was the constant "white noise" for us to sleep by. Interestingly enough, you could clearly hear the sound of the ocean waves from inside the bathroom too. There was a vent above the tub that vented out to the balcony and chaneled the ocean noises in.

"Trust in God" vs "Prepare for the day of Reckoning"

Through careful planning I managed to save up the the necessary final payment for our trip just before the economy nosedived. I then hemmed and hawed about whether to use up my vacation days while we were only working 4 day weeks. If I used them up to get 5 days pay, I would have none left by the time we went - meaning taking an unpaid vacation. If I DIDN'T use them up and the company went under before we left, I would never get to collect them and would have blown that money. Unfortunately for many - but thankfully for me - when they layed off 75% of the workforce, the rest of us got to work 40 hr weeks again (2 weeks before my vacation departure date). I fought off the "smart/safe" logic that said if we cancelled our trip and got our money back, we would be able to catch up on all overdue bills and have a small reserve. I half-kidded about wondering if I would have a job to come back to when we came back.


Well, I had faith and trusted that I would get to collect my vacation pay after my vacation, and that we "deserved" this trip and owed it to ourselves - no matter what happened. God would provide for us. "No pressure, no worries" as they love to say often on St. Lucia. So I put work out of my mind for a whole wonderful week.


Yesterday I trustingly drove to my job and was thankful to see that indeed I did still have one.

Phhhewwww!!! Thank You God!



















Today my boss informed all of us who still remained that our wages were being reduced by 10% until business improved.

we're BACK!

despite the fact that the very first sign you see when you walk off the tarmack and into the St Lucia airport states "If you wish to cancel your return flight, call 800-xxx-xxxx".

I am assuming that you all realize that we went to St. Lucia, W.I. (windward islands) for a week. Sandals Resort - Luxury Included Vacations (all-inclusive/all adult - you really must try it). Yes, we voted - and then skipped the country!

I will post more eloquent thoughts as we get re-acclimated to the real world again, but for starters here is a favorite photo that captures the experience quite well (being all-inclusive means that I was a major gluton for the first few days but I eventually mastered moderation!)

I title this shot "first breakfast in paradise".

BTW - Although Suzie's weight watcher "goal" was to "maintain", mine was to gain 5 pounds. I don't know yet how she did, but let me assure you - I succeeded!

(for the full photo album go here http://picasaweb.google.com/don.sueblauss/StLucia2008#

Please vote FOR somebody

My friend CRM sent a multi-forwarded "letter" explaining to us why we should not vote for Obama. I found this rather funny coming from (not originating from) a guy who hasn't voted in 30 years. If he DID vote, I assume it would be against Obama

Here's what I believe. there is NOBODY who goes into that job truly prepared for it. There is no way for one person to get all the experience needed ahead of time. It is an "On The Job Training" position. Therefore, like most creative jobs - you need to pick somebody who has a vision of what the future should look like, enthusiasm to pursue it, and an ability to sway people to cooperate with him/her to get there.
(as a comparison, I look at my Youth Ministry friends. All want good programs, but some actually envision what it looks like before they take the position. They are more likely to succeed.)
ALL politicians will make mistakes, or compromise on something they would prefer NOT to compromise on. Some will vote against a bill - not because of the particular issue, but because of all the attached strings. I don't think that being in the military automatically makes one better qualified to be commander-in-chief. It might give one an edge regarding on-going strategy of remaining in a conflict, but might limit ones views on how to get OUT of one or AVOID the next.

Obama has excited people - McCain has not.
Even the big money republicans who have the most to gain by a McCain victory, are reluctant to donate as much money to his campaign. Basically - Republican Bigwigs decided early on that McCain was a risky investment. If he can't win support from his own people, how can he negotiate successfully with Congress or foriegn governments for support of his ideas. Obama has proven the ability to convince people to believe he can & will succeed. This is an ability you can't teach a person. He can learn the details and methods as he goes. McCain cannot learn to be persuasive, no matter how experienced he might be at the details.

In short - I believe that Obama will listen more open-mindedly to a wider range of opinions, and make choices that will benefit a wider cross-section of Americans. I believe he has a vision of how America & Americans can be better, stronger, respected that is more closely in tune with my own. Although I admire McCains personal strength and loyalty to his country, he has not convinced me that he has a vision that drives him.

People who have a "Vision" can see what the end result should be. They might not know yet how to get there, but given a chance, they are more likely to figure it out. They are more likely to persuade others to cooperate with them in figuring it out.

I believe that I (and most people I know - average Americans) will be better off with Obama as President. Four years from now I might change my mind, but today - I'm voting for Obama.

If you believe in McCain, by all means -and with my blessing - vote FOR him.
But this "voting against somebody" idea is counter-productive.

Halloween party for Breast Cancer Awareness

We went, we impressed, we didn't win

(but Suzie Q's udders did actually dispense milk!)

(Barney & Betty Rubble - what acute couple)

testing 1, 2, 3

just testing out our new scanner/printer

pastel chalk by D. B. circa 1973

bonus points to the first person who can identify the subject in the drawing

(employees & relatives are not eligible to win)

I know the answers, if only I could figure out the questions

Like all people, taking a test brings to me an amount of anxiety - not debilitating, not even an obstacle, more like simply unwelcome thoughts that I know I should just ignore. Every year, all USAHockey referees have to attend a seminar and take a 50 question True/False closed book test. Before that, we have all already taken a 100 question open book test online, and started ref'ing games - so our heads should be pretty well into the sport by now. So last night I attended the last Mass. District USAHockey Seminar of the current season - a special session for level 3 officials only (guys & gals who have been ref'ing for at least 4 years - many like me in the 20+ range). We were mildly scolded over the appalling fact that apparently 66% of level 3 officials failed the level 3 test last year (it occurred to me that although no names were named, I think I've worked with a few of them!). One guy spent only 7 minutes to answer the 50 questions (he got 16 answers correct, and bounced back to beginner level 1 for his lack of effort).This year the instructrs were trying a new teaching techinque - we would all break down into groups of 6, each be given a copy of last years test, and one answer sheet per group. Using whatever resources we had at our disposal (rule books, manuals, cellphones, laptops, whatever) we were to answer the 50 questions. Whichever group was first to answer all 50 correctly would win a prize. So far in all previous seminars, the fastest time was 47 minutes. I was at a table with a gentleman about my age and a teen-20 kid, while across the aisle was a table of two teens and a 20something guy. As the kid next to me moved across to that table I thought to myself I should sit with the teenagers because everybody knows that teenage boys know everything there is to know and are never wrong - so I (and the guy next to me) joined them. Like most groups, we answered most questions quickly and confidently while a few elicited some amount of discussion and debate. Maybe six questions prompted somebody to open the rulebook to try to find the answer. We were one of the quicker groups to present our answers, but were told we had two wrong (but not told which two) - so had to go figure it out and correct ourselves. I know that there are always questions that are confusing due to the way they are worded - maybe/ maybe not trick questions, but certainly ones that can cause you to question the question ("what are they asking?"). I had already circled a few that I was suspicious of the first time through, so I immediately went back to revisit them. Almost immediately I had one of those "Oh, Duh!" moments and pointed out why #2 was false, not true. The other 5 looked, said "Oh, Duh", changed our answer and searched for the other incorrect answer. We had a few suspects, so we changed one more and brought it back again. "Still not 100% correct". I went back again to the one that bothered me the most, so we broke it down piece by piece as picky and technically as we could. With less than unanimous agreement, I convinced my teammates that we should change the answer and try again. BINGO! And we have a winner - and in record time of 43 minutes - DESTROYING the previous record time.

And we all got a nice Mass - USAHockey T-shirt for our efforts.

Then we got to take the real test. From experience I know that the most commonly missed questions from the previous year are always reworded and included into the current years test, and we had just disected last years test thoroughly. So despite the previous admonishment to take our time and think critically about our answers, I opted for the advise once given to me by the late great Referee-in-chief Milt Kaufman - "take the test like you are ref'ing a game. You don't have time to sit and dwell when you are on the ice. The situation happens and you make the call. If you know the rules, you will instictively make the right call." And of course if you DON'T know the rules, no amount of time spent thinking about them is going to help you. This has served me well for about 25 years, and I was the second person to hand in my completed test. As I stepped out of the meeting room into the hallway, I met my two District supervisors. I jokingly noted that I took longer than 7 minutes, and admitted that I will be really embarassed if I fail it this year. Bill laughed and said "No way, not you" and turned to Skip and said "He aced it last year you know". Apparently, that was noteworthy although it was a bit unnerving to think that out of a few hundred officials they oversee and the amount of incidences they had to address over the course of a year that he would remember what my last years test score was.

Referees should never 2nd guess themselves

"PeeWee C" games can be interesting because most of the kids are being allowed to check for the first time, and they aren't very good at it yet. They don't know how to give a hit, or take one. It leaves lots of leeway for a referee to decide what call to make (or not) and what level of severity to apply to it. So many times just this weekend I could have been choosing between "Charging" (aka taking a run at a player), "Boarding" (hitting an opponent violently into the boards), "Checking From Behind" (considered the most dangerous offense of all), or "Late/Avoidable Check" (self-explanatory) - if only the checker had actually hit the checkee instead of plastering himself into the boards when the intended victim sidestepped him, or he simply missed his intended victim (I say "him/he" because although girls do indeed play at this level, they are rarely so blatently out to kill). So when I witnessed what should be considered a check from behind, I blew the whistle, signaled the offender to the penalty box, and proceeded to skate in that direction. One trick a referee has at his disposal is to wait until he reaches the penalty box area before announcing the actual penalty being called - giving him the opportunity to mull over the options and pick the best one without committimg too early to a regretable call. So on my way I decided it was really mostly a shove, not a meanspirited check, and although no physical harm done it was worthy of a penalty so to send a message. I decided a 1-1/2 minute minor "Boarding" call would be sufficient, instead of issueing the 1-1/2 minute minor plus 10 minute misconduct required for a "Check From Behind" call. The Coach started arguing with me (in itself worthy of a penalty) as soon as I got within talking distance, but I was in a good enough mood so I explained that they were getting off easy because my first inclination was to call the "Check from behind" so therefore they were catching a break. Now clearly I didn't realize I was dealing with a very smart coach, who explained to me that the check wasn't hard enough to qualify as "violently into the boards". Now I've been wrong before as a referee (thinking I had made a mistake when i actually hadn't) and this clearly was another instance when I was proved to be wrong. Therefore I told the coach that I was willing to grant his wish and NOT call the penalty a 1-1/2 minute Boarding. I would revert to the proper call for the infraction - a 1-1/2 minute minor plus 10 minute misconduct for the Check From Behind (which also requires a second player to go into the box - someone has to come out when the other kid's first minor penalty expires but his misconduct starts). There - I'm happy - I finally got the call right for the type of hit delivered.
(I'm not sure the coach has yet figured out what hit HIM yet, tho')
(shame I wasn't in a bad mood - I would have given the coach a Bench Minor penalty to top it all off, but he had already made my day and probably a few more to come, and that would have just been plain vindictive on my part and I am supposed to remain calm & professional throughout all)

my brush with radio fame

Joe & I pulled into the 4-H club parking lot for his chicken club meeting and the first thing I noticed was the abnormal number of vehicles. It was a small sporatic club last year, but apparently this year shall be different - lots of new members. One of the new members neighbor is a former longtime 4-H'er who is going to be an assistant leader. Her Boyfriend attended with her, bearing many gifts for the club. T-shirts, mouse pads, pens, event tickets - all bearing the call letters of the Boston radio stations he works for. When introduced I knew immediately who he was, and was bummed that I had actually chosen to NOT were my Beatles sweatshirt - because he is the Sunday morning host of a radio show that showcases them and offers lots of trivia. I listen to him often while I drive to or from the rink. He promised to have something for me at next months meeting. Julie already wants it - not even knowing what it is (other than "SWAG"). Maybe she will come and audit the class!! 4-H IS cool!

... because it feels so good when I stop!

You know the old routine that goes
Question: "Why do you do (insert torturous activity here)?"
Answer: "Because it feels so good when I stop!"

Well it doesn't always work out like that. I refereed 4 games in the morning (3 by myself - no partner - and it is a simple equation that having only half of the typical two referees means double the skating at twice as hard for the one referee). Then we went hiking in the Blue Hills for 2 hours. The skating I handled rather well, then the legs were a bit sore during the hiking. But sitting for an hour in the restaurant - 'tho at first seeming like "it feels so good when I stop!"- was a killer when it was time to stand up and move again.

After 25 years, you would think no more surprises

But of course you would be wrong. No - not the marriage (not for this post anyway) - I've been refereeing hockey for close to the amount of time we've been married (actually maybe longer - I'm not sure anymore). So far after a month of games, it has been fairly calm and uneventful. The only noteworthy (barely) instances have been tossing a Bantam coach from a game - for protesting too loud and too long over a "NON-Icing" call, and a new unexpected twist - the first time I ever had a parent from the stands demand a time-out and cause his team a penalty (and I thought I had already seen it all - silly me).
So it's during a Peewee game (everyone is about 13 years old), it's halfway through the game and as I'm about to drop a faceoff, the league director calls me to the rink gate. The blue team's goalies father is insisting we stop the game so his daughter - the goalie - can change masks. He claims the one she's wearing doesn't fit right and is hurting her. I suggest that in 5 minutes the period will end and there will be a short timeout. At this the father's anger level starts rising and warns me that this is not an acceptable solution. I advise the director and the father that the only other option is to call a "Delay of Game" penalty on the blue team and change the mask, but of course I should really skate over and let the blue teams coach know what is going on. So I skate across to the players bench, where the blue teams coach askes "what's the problem?". I explain the mask situation, and he asks "can't we wait until the end of the period?". I reply that was my idea, but Dad is insistant, and if the mask is getting switched now - they will have to take the penalty. The coaches look at each other, then the director who has arrived with the new mask, then the goalie, then at each other, shrugged and said "we'll send somebody over to the penalty box". I'm guessing that they had never had a parent force them to take a team penalty. I can't wait to see what else I haven't seen yet!

Canoes & picnic tables don't mix

While Suzie, Joe & I were leisurely paddling around the pond, Jamie was fishing and Tim was lounging along the shore. Auntie Maria walked down and while chatting with the boys, watched three young guys (20ish types) toss a picnic table from the town beach off the town docks into the pond. They then proceeded to sit on the beach just watching it float. Maria (former teacher, current member of the committee that oversees the town beach, and next door neighbor to the beach) walked over to confront the boys. Using I'm sure her well-honed "scornfull teacher" voice got the boys to agree that they would indeed pull the table out of the water. 10 minutes later they were still watching it from the beach. Having finished our canoe trip, and having been brought up to speed with the picnic table saga, it became my turn to do something. I walked across the beach to the parking lot area, surveyed the half-dozen vehicles, and tried to guess which would be the most likely get-away car, and started writing down license plate numbers. The Taurus with the mega-boom box speakers in the rear windshield seemed almost too obvious so as I walked back I asked them which car was theirs. They refused to look at me, answer me, or react in any way whatsoever. I specifically asked if theirs was the Taurus, but was greeted (or "un"greeted) by the same non-response. Jamie, who never misses any drama watched the whole scene while pretending to fish off the docks. Almost immediately after I was off the beach and out of sight on "our side" Jamie called over to say they were running for their cars. Before I could get to a close enough vantage point, they were peeling out of the lot in two vehicles (btw - NOT the Taurus). Apparently, as soon as they decided I had the wrong plate number, they figured they better escape at first chance. I found it pretty humorous to think these three 20-something kids were brave enough to pick on a defenseless picnic table, but too scared to face the consequences of such a petty offense. Of course I now had to go get the picnic table out of the water, so I grabbed some rope and hopped back into the canoe and paddled over to were the picnic raft was floating. In case you ever have to perform an aquatic rescue of a table from a canoe, it doesn't go as smoothly as you may think. I did manage to tow it close enough to then wade in and pull it the rest of the way to land. Jamie helped me haul it back up onto the beach, then we all hoisted the canoe up onto the roof of the van (also, not as easy at it may sound - the van roof is about 7ft up) and headed for home to dry-dock the vessel for the winter.

Homecoming Queen Julie - 2008

Slipping

OK - I admit it - I'm slipping.

I no longer check Paula and Kate's blogs daily.

(Seriously, that's a good thing 'cause they NEVER BLOG anymore and haven't for some time now - and it's too OCD of me to keep looking)

(sorry ladies, it's just that we miss you and wish there was something new there to read!)